Three things.

This week has been crazy-busy filled. I'm trying not to start off every sentence with "OH It's so busy." But January has been my most-full month since moving this summer and I kinda-sorta-want a break. Despite the chaos fullness of this month, there's not much to write home about but more like a few little going-ons and sweet nothings.

• We started Financial Peace University, thanks to Sarah a.k.a. Thrifty Decor Chick. She so graciously offered a giveaway on her blog with the prize being enrollment in FPU (as she also has had a wonderful outcome with it) and I was shocked that I won! Justin has been "preaching" the word of debt-free living and Dave Ramsey's ways for a long, long (long) time but I'm very thankful because his financial planning, budgeting and paying-off-debtedness has literally saved our behinds. I don't like to talk about financial specifics, but I would like to say that we both brought a lot of debt to our marriage (and I continued creating debt with my stupid decision to go to grad school [SIDE NOTE: DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH GRAD SCHOOL COSTS? Geeze.]) and we reached a place where there was no way to make the minimum payments on our debt, even after moving back in with my parents, and getting rid of a car which we so desperately needed at the time, and in fact on our salaries today would continue to be unable to make those payments. I'm talking not being able to make loan and credit card payments that did not even touch the principal.  I can't think about that time without being very sad but also extremely thankful that life threw us a few opportunities (cough, Saudi Arabia, cough) and Justin's ability to plan and budget (and basically follow the FPU ideas) that let us climb back from there. I'm not trying to write a sob story here, since uh, the debt was our fault, but rather a success story to let others know there is hope even when you are that in debt. I can't believe this enormous bullet we dodged and will never be stupid with money again. Although I don't espouse Dave's religious views, the beauty of the program is to live debt-free and build wealth so that you can give back, which is where our hearts lie as well. We are so, SO thrilled to be able to take the class and continue to fine-tune our financial planning and hear Dave's entertaining teachings to keep us on track. I don't mean to sound all cult-member-ish, but I'm just excited that this solid and logical financial advice helped bring us back from a very low point to a very, very relieved and enjoyable one. It is truly peaceful living. 
• This:

          was the temperature Wednesday. And also why I'm okay with the higher cost of living here.  
         (Rest assured, it did snow today).

• Dylan and I are reading the Harry Potter series together (Hey- I'm only a decade behind the times here, and in my defense, I have seen and enjoyed all of the movies). It has become a really enjoyable bonding experience for us- each night Dylan will ask, "Are you going to read with me tonight?" and asks me not to stop when we conclude a chapter. Last night, he decided he was going to write a story entitled, Mama and the Chamber of Reading. I love that boy, and our nightly reading sessions. 

It's not you, it's me

I would like to start off by stating, for the record, that I am fully aware that I am the type of person who learns best from her mistakes, from doing something and then seeing if it works and if not, reflecting and tweaking from there. I see this whole process play out in my day job, other pursuits, and my parenting.

I am a big advocate for kids having chores, i.e., responsibility. I think we've always had Dylan help with chores but I wanted to make a more organized system for him. Being a list-maker, I sought out to create a carefully-thought-out and planned but what ended up being a not-quite-effective system for him to do so. I even have the laminated chore chart to prove it:

The system seemed okay, with my original intent to teach self-monitoring (re: checking off what he had done) and delayed gratification (re: receiving reinforcement a.k.a. allowance at the end of the week). However, we everyone else realized quickly that this was not going to work. It took me awhile to come to this conclusion, being the stubborn "LET'S JUST KEEP TRYING" person I am, and a little bit of ego over the whole "LOOK HOW CAREFULLY PLANNED OUT THIS SYSTEM WAS!" Wow there's a lot of self-disclosure and introspection going on in this discussion. Anyway,  the process of checking off each day's worth of chores and waiting the entire week for money was not teaching my intended lessons, and leaving everyone frustrated when I was nagging reminding Dylan to do chores, and checking them off, and then he would forget and end the week with an empty chore chart and of course be frustrated that he didn't earn his allowance DESPITE DOING HIS CHORES. Which is SO not the intended lesson here.

I wanted to do something much simpler, that would actually motivate Dylan to do chores and help out without me nagging reminding him, and would not require a complicated system of checking-off and completing 3 chores from the above column while also completing everyday chores (as I'm typing this out, I'm hearing myself and how complicated I made it.. geeze).

 We talked to Dylan and decided on having him complete his expected chores everyday, without any type of allowance or reward, because they were expected as part of our family and helping out with household chores. These 'everyday chores' are pretty straightforward- making his bed and feeding the cats. He must do them before going out to play with friends, and if not, he will lose 30 minutes of his weekend video-game time (he has a timer and allotted time for videogames on weekends... a system which has actually worked very well for us).

Additionally, I post tasks and chores around the house that he can complete, along with the money he will earn for completing, on post-its on the fridge. These have included, cleaning his room, vacuuming the rug in the living room, dusting shelves, cleaning the bathroom mirrors or windows in the living room, and so on. Dylan can take a post-it with the chore, complete it, hand it to me and instantly receive his money. These come and go- for instance, the other day I had 'vacuum the rug' posted, which he chose not to do, and I decided to vacuum the whole apartment myself so I took that one down. There's no arguing, fighting, or nagging anymore, which I like. Dylan has chosen to do a few of the chores, and skipped others, but I suspect he will be more motivated once his holiday cash runs out.


Lesson learned: If it ain't broke, don't fix it. BUT IF IT IS FACT BROKE, by all means fix it. 

Our Elf on the Shelf: A Cautionary Tale

Merry Christmas Eve! So I'm sure you've heard of the The Elf on the Shelf*, a tradition that was started in our home back in 2008. Dylan is so eager to find the Elf each morning (ours is named Blooper) and is so enchanted with him. I catch Dylan talking to him, telling him the good things he's done and updating him on his wish list.

If you're not familiar, the elf visits from the North Pole and changes location each night after returning to Santa to update him on your child's behaviors. A story book with the Elf outlines the details and reminds your child to never touch the Elf or he will lose his magic.

Cue mistake on our end.

A babysitter came to watch Dylan one evening (while we attended the SMASHING PUMPKINS in concert OMG it was fantastic, hearing Billy [yes of course we're on a first name basis] play 'Bullet with Butterfly Wings' and 'Disarm' AND an awesome 'Space Oddity' cover live was a.maze.ing., I digress)... So a babysitter came and was unfamiliar with the 'rules' surrounding the Elf and we overlooked letting her know. Dylan woke up the next morning to get ready for school and was upset, telling me that the babysitter didn't know and moved the Elf, and he didn't move and now his magic is gone! (Again, completely our fault for not sharing this information re: not touching the Elf).

So, I did what any parent would do on 4 hours of sleep (did I mention I was out rocking to the Smashing Pumpkins live late into the night before?) and googled: What to do if someone touches your elf on the shelf. Surprisingly G-rated and appropriate results came up.

Thanks to Southern Disposition, I was able to act fast. We quickly e-mailed Santa himself, asking what to do, and about 15 minutes later (MAN he's fast for such a busy person), we received our response:

Forgive the grammatical errors... I (ahem, er I mean Santa) was on 4 hours of sleep here.

Dylan. was. thrilled! He went off to school, and when he returned home, the following was waiting in our mailbox, magically:

"Mailed via Reindeer Express; Caution: Magic Elf Dust enclosed"

We sprinkled the Magic Elf Dust on Blooper, and he returned to the North Pole that evening and ended up in a different spot the next morning. Dylan still excitedly talks to him and continues to jump out of bed to look for him each morning.

Belief in Santa Claus: saved. Cue: self high-five.





Merry, merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!



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We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas...

Like I said, I get really excited about Christmas. So, here is part 3 (I think the final portion but I make no guarantees) of my holiday decorations. This portion of the tour takes you to: my kitchen.

On top of my cabinet (that stores candle-making supplies and candles) we have a frosted cranberry tree, and two plates that I made with Dylan when he was itty-bitty. The left plate is his hand prints in wreath-form from 2005 (zomg, so little!) when he was 2, and the right is a reindeer made from his hand- and footprint in 2004 when he was 1.

On top of the cabinets sits our Santa (can you see the theme here, we love the guy is all I can say) with his sleigh and reindeer.

I added jingle bells and a red candle to my candle vase.

And the grand finale, my centerpiece tray to which I added jingle bells and small glittery ornaments to surround 3 of my holiday-scented candles.

Please excuse the mess of bags/containers in the background, our 'treat table' is currently overflowing (but not for long bwahahah)

I am enjoying the festive look around here and all the warm candlelights and tree lights add a warm, comforting glow in the evening.

We've been hosting a 'hot cocoa bar' nightly for ourselves, accruing our beverages with our choice of Christmas-tree shaped Peeps, mint M & M's, candy canes, and whipped cream covered in cinnamon or sprinkles. We've been sipping these delectable creations while watching our Christmas classics DVDs. Tonight we'll be renting 'Arthur Christmas.' Before bed, we read one of our favorite Christmas stories, so far we've covered Bear Stays Up for Christmas, The Polar Express, The Christmas Magic, The Wild Christmas Reindeer, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, A Bad Kitty Christmas and more. We save "The Muppets Christmas Carol" movie and The Night Before Christmas (illustrated by Jan Brett) for our Christmas eve tradition.

I try to emphasize to Dylan that Christmas is a time to spend with family, friends and loved ones and enjoy their company. I hope we are conveying that through all of our traditions.

It's Christmastime... in the city

We went to see the National Tree this past weekend. Here are a few photos from that romp around DC that help get me in the spirit...

My neighbor Obama.

This last image is of Dylan peeking into Santa's workshop. I can't tell you how excited he is over Santa's upcoming visit. I love the joyful chatter about the logistics of making a trip around the world, the qualifications for being on the 'nice list,' and so on. I wish this stage lasted forever. 

Things that make me happy..

These are just a few of the things bringing a smile to my face right now:

1) Organization. I present, a little before-and-after that makes my heart sing (GAH cannot. stand. clutter):

Before: a messy slew of shoes every time I walk in the door, to trip over!

After: Ahhh so much better. 

2) Living near the Smithsonian Museums:

3) My aunt and uncle joining us for Thanksgiving, then taking us to the Building Museum:

Photo credit: My uncle

4) Creative holiday wrapping ideas, from Pinterest:

I'm the next Martha Stewart! Not really..

Yes, I'm that annoying neighbor who has all their Christmas decorations up this early, so I'll be sharing soon. 

Giving thanks

One thing I like to do on a regular basis to stay try to be mentally healthy is to keep up a gratitude journal. This sums it up better than I ever could, but basically reflecting on the things we are thankful for keeps us happier, easier to get along with, less materialistic, and healthier in general.

Image found here.

I have struggled at times with this practice, sometimes being snarky (e.g., I am thankful for... hard liquor) but I agree with the above. It is interesting to look back and reflect on what I've been thankful for at different times over the past few years.. times when Justin was gone, I was struggling with working full-time and parenting on my own, times when other things have gone wrong in my life.

This is my Gratitude journal. I was using a plain ol' notebook until I found this in a little shop in Shirlington and was smitten.

Each page features a quote on gratitude. 

'We are the heroes of our own story.'

I am truly enjoying this practice but haven't been keeping up with it as much as I would like. I've also noticed that Dylan has been making more negative statements than usual, complaints about school or friends and so on. I wanted to infuse (if you will) some more gratitude into our lives and also teach him my practice. In the spirit of the season (Thanksgiving, that is), I decided to copy the idea that Young House Love featured a while back, and also what is sold at Wisteria (but for way too much money, IMHO) and create a gratitude jar.

I used the same technique as featured on the Young House Love link above, etching "Give Thanks" into the side of a ginormous mason jar I've had for awhile.

Side story: This jar was also used to catch five of the ten fish Dylan keeps in his aquarium at a trip to a local lake. I thought the fish would never make it, but here we are, months later and they're still kickin'. Go figure. I did clean the jar out after. Maybe.

I picked out some fall-ish scrapbooking paper and cut it into small pieces so we can all write what we are thankful for. Often, we will sit down together as a family and secretly record our response. We plan to read them all on Thanksgiving. However, I hope to keep this practice up for Dylan (and myself) long past the leftovers.

I can honestly say that I have an incredible amount to be thankful for. Without disclosing too much personal, sappy crap, things were a bit tough for me for awhile there, but have only been looking up lately. Things that I could have never dreamed of, not just moving to where we're living now (which HELL YES I am thankful for), but other things I could not have imagined this time last year, both family- and career-wise, are actually happening. Things are just, falling into place. I know my 'luck' may not always be so good but for now, I'm enjoying it.

Why last weekend was awesome:

Dylan's weekly soccer game was the first one his team won, lifting the spirits of several 8-year-old boys. Dylan was very excited.

Last weekend was also awesome as we continued our annual fall tradition of visiting the 'pumpkin patch.' We visited Cox Farms in Centreville, where although the admission price was shockingly high ($17, seriously?) we got our money's worth with tons to do.

There were a variety of fun slides, where you sit on a seed sack to go down. From here on out, this post is in 'I Spy' format.

Similar to 'Where's Waldo,' we'll be playing "Where's Dylan?" today. Five gold stars to whomever wins.

I spy... a goat

I spy... Justin

I spy... Dylan

Farm animals for petting were also plentiful.

News alert: Giant bunnies have taken over D.C.

My favorite cow!

Dylan's favorite part was the hay ride, which was ACTION-PACKED (re: going through a river and pond, passing under a troll bridge, passing through a grave yard, and so on and so on).

Too soon, Cox Farms, too soon.

We also enjoyed the "Cornundrum" (if you know me, you know I love a cheesy play on words) a.k.a. a corn maze.

Continuing the Michael Jackson theme... Man in the Mirror

Entering the 'bug' house- filled with (fake, thankfully) bugs and critters.

There were also live bands (yes, multiple) playing, which we enjoyed while chowing down on some kettle corn, chili dogs, and deliciously fresh apple cider. 

And of course, playing in hay and picking a pumpkin (not literally from the patch, but rather carefully selecting an already-picked-pumpkin, I guess you could say).

All in all it was a wonderful fall day. I love that this has inadvertently become our family tradition in the fall, visiting the 'farm' to select a pumpkin, enjoy a hay ride and some fresh apple cider. I look back at pictures from when we first started taking Dylan (Justin was there too, even way back when) and think of the excitement Dylan shares each year, as if it was new each time.

Dylan and Justin, Blake's Big Apple 2007

I love when he is happy-giddy over the activity we're doing, taking on a very serious voice with a hint of excitement, carefully weighing pros and cons of eating kettle corn first or taking the hay ride first. He's such a great kid.

I used to LOVE the wax lips as a kid too!